When I was 4 years old, there was a flood in my town. Our house was on higher ground and was not damaged, but I can remember my mother sitting me down to explain to me that there were children who lost everything. Children who didn't have a bed to sleep in at night, much less a teddy bear to cuddle. She gently guided me to my play area and we sat there on the floor and went through all my toys deciding which My Little Ponies and Barbies could go to new homes to make other little girls happy during a sad and scary time. My brothers and I had our first real lesson in giving to those in need, which isn't typically easy for children, but I remember it going quite smoothly. You see, our young minds sensed on some level that giving to others was our responsibility because we'd seen our parents give to others in so many ways.
I'm so blessed to have learned this incredible lesson at such a young age. After all, it's woven into the very fabric of this great nation.
Growing up I was involved in several charities through Girl Scouts, church youth groups, my dance team, my school, etc. From Adopt-A-Highway to soup kitchens to nursing homes to visiting shut-ins, I was schooled in the art of giving. Admittedly much of what I did was pre-organized, required, or meant to look good on a college application, but that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it. It was all very structured, but it meant being able to give my time and money without having to actually come up with ways to do so. In college it was after school programs, Big Buddies, and mentoring.
These days I always try to donate the $1 to organizations like MDA and March of Dimes that use gas stations, restaurants, & drug stores to raise money. I put a few bucks in the offering plate at church to support the nuns working to restore their school and church in Haiti. I run races that raise money for everything from cancer research to youth centers. When I traveled abroad, I volunteered whenever and wherever I could. A Dalit Village in India, a school for the deaf in Vietnam, a small indigenous village on the Amazon. All these things are opportunities that are presented to me, but what am I doing on my own? How can I be proactive? Why do I feel that I'm not doing enough?
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| So thrilled for our help! Dalit Village, India |
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| Dalit Village, India |
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| Amazon Village, Peru |
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| Amazon |
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| Amazon Village |
I don't like showy giving or people who seek recognition for their charity work, so I struggled with blogging about this topic.... but perhaps it will reach someone who yearns to make a big difference in a small way but isn't quite sure how. Or perhaps you all will share with me ways in which you help those in need... things I can start doing as well. Up until recently, I wasn't sure what to do to help. Now that I've opened my mind and really searched my soul, I keep finding new ways to do things for other people.
My very favorite type of giving is when it comes to animals. I'm the girl that keeps kibble in her glove compartment and a towel in the trunk just in case I come across a hungry or hurt animal that will let me close enough to rescue him. It's literally a hobby of mine. When people find stray animals, they call me to help them catch the poor guys. If you've ever been to my parents' house, you'd understand why. I think I was in middle school before I realized that people actually bought and sold pets and that not everyone found their dog on the side of the road or cat in a dumpster. Helping animals is something that I know I'm meant to do, and it's always come naturally. I love to help people, too, but it tends to be more complicated.
You see, for many years I naively thought that when you see a homeless person that you ought to just give them a wad of cash quickly (after all, they could be dangerous!) and pat yourself on the back. Traveling to developing countries opened my eyes to the ugly realities and hidden ramifications of being charitable. It's not as straightforward as I once thought.
The fact is that a large percentage of the homeless are suffering from a mental illness, drug/alcohol addiction, or both. Is cash really a good idea? No. I don't want to enable this person's habit. So a few years ago I decided that the only things I will give a homeless person are tangible: blankets, clothing, food, water, etc. Have I ever had homeless people curse me for not giving them money instead? Yes. Why bother giving if they're going to be ungrateful? That's easy. I'd certainly rather run the risk of this lost soul being unappreciative than have him go hungry. Anyway, very few people are ever anything but gracious. Most of them ask God to bless me. I really like that. : )
What about the darker side of giving? When I was in Ireland, I saw homeless gypsies performing in the streets of Dublin while their children pick pocketed the onlookers. I was a teenager at the time who was dumbfounded by the thought of parents employing their children to be thieves.
When I was in India in my early 20s, I was bombarded by dozens of dirty skinny children with huge sad eyes begging me for any change I could spare. I remember being so impressed that they could ask for money in a dozen languages. I literally had one child wrap her limbs around my leg until I paid her to remove herself so I could climb into a taxi. My friends and I giggled at the resourceful beggar child, but soon our laughter turned to horrified screams. As the taxi sped off, we witnessed a group of 7 or 8 older kids push her to the ground and mercilessly punch and kick her until she gave them the handful of coins I'd paid her. They continued to beat her. I caused this to happen. I couldn't stop crying. I was jaded for a very long time after that. Experiences like these taught me that it's important to consider what it is I am giving and to whom I am giving it. Am I actually helping this person? What is it that they truly need?
When I was in Tanzania, I was in a van that passed through a small rural village where several children were walking to school. In this area, children were only allowed to attend school if they had their own writing utensils and paper, which happened to be more valuable than gold in their eyes. I was busy writing in my journal when a young boy tapped on my window and grinned "Please miss, do you have a pen for me? I want to go to school. Please? A pen?" I rummaged through my bag and realized I had only the pen in my hand, so I rolled down the window and handed this sweet child a pen. I was so impressed that this boy had not even thought about asking for food or money, but he only wanted to chance to attend school. One day I want to return with a year's supply of pens.
I hope to spend my life helping those in need.. from my furry friends to the homeless Vietnam vet down the street to the orphans halfway around the world. As part of my 101 in 1001, I decided to start keeping granola bars, protein bars, and random snacks in my car. I occasionally see a few homeless people at certain intersections, and I have no excuse not to help them eat. I am so incredibly blessed and so fortunate... how could I justify ignoring these people? No matter how low I'm feeling, or how stressed out or anxious or sad... giving someone something as simple as a a bottle of water and a protein bar is all I need to lift my spirits. It gives me such a rush that I end up feeling like it's a bit selfish in the end, but I suppose as long as I'm helping out it's all good. It reminds me that we're all human, fighting to find our way. It also remind me that I have a higher purpose: to give. And it's only just begun.
Wishing you all the joy of giving....
